Yikes

This is a profile shot...with his face smashed up against my placenta :) 31 weeks 4 days

Its funny that my last post was "Early?"

...we had a snow storm come thru on Wednesday night(1/26) and I was having tons of contractions when I finally got home from work. Also a few throughout the day, most likely from stressing about driving home! They werent just braxton hicks, these hurt and started in my back. Of course when it was whiteout conditions outside they were fierce. I was finally able to go to sleep after taking a tylenol and drinking lots of water. I kept saying if we could have we would have headed to L&D!

The next day I went to work 1/2 day--driving on snow and ice packed roads...im surprised he didnt fall out it was so bumpy!! lol I had my regular ob check up in the afternoon. Everything was fine by then of course. Got weighed, checked bp and she showed me the heartbeat. She was going to try and get a 3d picture for us but his hand was infront of his face. He was moving his mouth a lot, swallowing...or talking to us :) it was the cutest thing! Dr came in next and said well youre easy, howd I get so lucky?! Thats when I said well I guess I should mention I had a million contractions last night. Theeeen she went into super concerned doctor mode and looked at my cervix by pelvic ultrasound. Then proceeded to tell me it looked short and would need to do a vaginal...along with a fetal fibronectin test aand group B strep just incase the fFN was positive. If it were to be positive she said id go on bed rest and maybe have to get shots to help mature his lungs. His lungs?? Not something we wanted to hear!

The appointment didnt help with my anxiety at allll. I left shaking and so anxious to get the results back. Every movement and contraction had me soo worried no matter how hard I tried not to. Its so easy for other people to say "oh dont worry itll be ok!" Yeah, It will be ok when I have a healthy baby in my arms...so id rather not hear that. :) mmmk thaanks.

Anyway, I didnt sleep well...(mainly because my dog chose to sleep on my side of the bed and take up all the room :)

I got to work and an hour or so later got a call from nurse Kim to tell me the results from the test were NEGATIVE! yaaaay.

So that was that. No bed rest, no shots...and Austin is staying where he belongs for the moment :) happy mommy.

...Ok so I wouldnt have been opposed to atleast a few days off work...but not weeeks. Then it really would have dragged! Im hoping these next 7ish weeks go by fairly quick!

We get to see little man again on Valentines day...measurments and all! Cant wait to hear how big he is now.

Early?

When i found out I was pregnant I just had a feeling that this baby was going to come early. Then we found out it was a boy and thought for sure he would be early because hes so low and he just seems to want out. Or maybe I just hoped he would decide to come on March 17th. How cool would it be to have a rainbow baby on St Pattys day?!?! Still hoping.

Now im getting a little anxious because so far 3/4 of my BLM friends have had their rainbow babies early. I know I cant control when he comes but im sure anxiety is not helping. Every pain now is concerning. If he does decide to wait until my induction(March 25...3 days before dd) then this is going to be a LONG 2 months!!

Uncomfortable

I am finally 30 weeks...(in my 31st week of pregnancy, does anyone else find that confusing? I always did)

Anyway, I'm really starting to get uncomfortable now. It just hit me hard this week. I'm feeling pretty large...and very TIRED. The terrible painful excruciating stupid lower back pain and having to flip over every 30 minutes at night make sleep a hard thing to get. I know I said I wouldn't complain...but I'm just at a point of frustration. I have been pregnant FOR.EVE.ERRR and still no babies. Am I going to be able to handle motherhood? Starting to freak out a little about labor(!!!) and bringing our little man home. I watch some shows and (E)news and other people with babies and it just looks different now. Not real. Not in my world atleast. Maybe I'm just good at carrying babies but will I be good at taking care of them? I know once he gets here things (should) will change and it'll be natural...or so I hope! I know ill get tons of unwanted advice and I pray that I won't get frusterated with these people. I mean, I should know about raising a baby...I hate that I didn't get the opportunity and all I know is how to be pregnant. Well, once Austin gets here ill be sooo gald to be thru with the pregnant part for a little while!...a few months atleast ;)

Cravings

{I haven't posted in a while...mainly because for some reason the app I use doesn't save drafts so the posts I've written just get deleted and I don't like starting over}

So the new craving is oranges and blackberries. YUM. Don't bring me asparagus anymore tho, that stuff is naaaassty! How on earth did I eat that drenched in garlic and lemon juice every day for months? Ick.

Funny how things change :)

Ill update sometime soon, Austy sure is getting large!

9 weeks to go.

25 week belly

We miiight have a birth date!

My 25 week appointment went really well...

Austin is measuring 11 days ahead. His heart rate was 147 and he's 1lb 15oz! He's going to be a big boy I just know it...

The doctor commented on his big head and extra long arms :) ...(he is ALL Ryon) I'm ok with that as long as I can have him naturally.

My scheduled induction is 3/25/11, just 3 days before my actual due date. I was back and forth with being induced and letting him come on his own. As much as I want it to just happen...I'm terrified that we wouldn't make it to the hospital since Bella came so "quick". So I suppose we'll go for a more controlled labor...unless he decides to come earlier on his own. After my next appointment I start going every 2 weeks...woohoo!

Here's a few pictures of little man. So in love with his little face!! :)

Almost 25 weeks!

I wake up everyday and think, OK so how far along am I now? And for some reason I always say 30...?? And catch myself, and say wait no its 20 something!! I wish I was 30 something weeks tho! But he needs to stay put because as fabulous as the NICU is it's not somewhere we want to be! Maybe its because this time last year I WAS 30 something weeks. Sheesh. I feel like I've been pregnant FOREVER.

SO long to go...

This pregnancy is very different. Theres the obvious reasons but then just little things he does and that I've had to deal with also. There really isn't any comparison except for the morning sickness...which FINALLY let up! woohoo, only 6 months this time! I have FELT sick...but the actual act of getting sick has stopped (fingers crossed!)

He moves all the time now. I absolutely love it, but sometimes it just plain hurts! He just feels so bony. That's the best way I can describe it. I love feeling him roll around in there tho. He favors my right side...whereas his sister was always on my left side, and usually stuck up under my ribs. He sits lower and only occasionally gets stuck up under my ribs on the right side. Also something pretty strange that never happened before...if I turn a certain way or am laying on my back and go to get up, I've been thrown back down. Its almost like I'm hurting him or some type of spasm. I cant even begin to describe it, its so weird! Its only happened a few times but it freaks me out every time and I just freeze.

I played music for him last night from my phone and he seemed to like it...or it was just too loud and he was kicking for me to stop..lol, I think he liked it tho! I was having a sad moment thinking about Bella and decided to listen to a few "son" songs to change gears.

He kicked a lot to this song.

Being pregnant while having to go through all these "firsts" have been pretty hard. I know the anticipation is a lot worse than the actual days...but its still SO hard. As Bella's birthday and Christmas approaches I find myself crying a lot more. I'm just EXTRA emotional. Ive read where this affects the baby. I sure hope not. I'm trying my best to give him my all, while still grieving Bella and remembering her. I guess that's all I can do is try my best and it'll be what it'll be...

**We also started on the nursery! I cant wait for it to be finished(as sad as it makes me to see all things pink gone!)
I will post pics as soon as it is complete! Which might be a while so dont hold your breath :)